Liverpool vs Toulouse, August 28th

The Crouchasaurus, man. Big, tall, languid, but a great touch, the big man up front ...
Ray Hudson, 1:59 1st

The big lighthouse there, Crouch, flashing his big light, saying 'Give me it, feed me.'
Ray Hudson, 4:25 1st

Settled down nicely, good early touches, ten minutes in for the new boy. Good haircut, for a footballer.
Ray Hudson, 11:58 1st

He gets a good, flying, ginger-headed, big, hammer blow on this one ...
Ray Hudson, 16:39 1st

The Crouchasaurus strikes again. Telling ya, footballer! Most unorthodox player, probably, in world football, but his technique is sweet and his danger is omnipresent. He's always going to get this one with those telescopic legs, that's a fabulous ball by Dirk the Dutchman. Brilliantly leading his big man, that's a great finish. Outside of his foot, stabs it home. Peter, the Great!
Ray Hudson, 18:45 1st

And big Peter makes his point like Woody Woodpecker.
Ray Hudson, half-time

Fabulous ball in. Meets it clean, accurate, dynamic. It's a screamer of a header. He locks his focus in, jumps, jackknifes, punches. Bulging net, broken spirits.
Ray Hudson, 3:38 2nd

The biggest scouser fans I've ever met. All be sitting in there, Richie probably in his red underpants, knowing him.
Ray Hudson
You know a little too much about Richie.
Phil Schoen, 12:34 2nd

English bookmakers getting it right once again, the sons of ... guns.
Ray Hudson, 18:44 2nd

Comes through and rifles Mascherano, takes a big filet mignon out of him. Just the type of thing to wake up an Argentine.
Ray Hudson, 19:21 2nd

That's absolutely brilliant by Peter. He does all the impossible stuff, absolutely first class, look at this, brings it down, controls it, angles himself, gets it away from the defender and then puts his finger down his throat.
Ray Hudson, 34:12 2nd

Steve Gerrard Gerrard looks down, gets out of his regal seat and applause, because what he sees is mucho good, look at this ball from Kuyt, he gets it back and he rasps it into the net. Dynamic finish, beautiful, play it back, red carpet, one touch, it's goodnight Toulouse.
Ray Hudson, 41:24 2nd

Inviting Dirk onto it, and that steadying touch, but then he doesn't live those beautiful ginger locks, because instinctively, like the great finisher he is, he knows that that back post isn't moving, he knows strategically where it is, and like a big, great pool player, he gets his cue out and that right foot, and kisses it in off the post ...
Ray Hudson, 41:55 2nd

Look at that. Laser. Great fly's eye vision by Benayoun. Tricky, outside of the foot. Dirk sees his angle, Dirk sees the net, Dirk sees disco tonight.
Ray Hudson, 46:13 2nd

Blogrolled!

Thankyou, Linda at the beautiful game, who has a cracking blog that everyone should go read.

Valencia vs Villarreal, August 26th

Skill absolutely coming out of his fingernails ...
Ray Hudson, 2:21 1st

Robert Pires really fluffing his beautiful coloured feathers ...
Ray Hudson, 4:55 1st

David Villa and three others caught with their knickers down ...
Ray Hudson, 22:33 1st

That's the red stuff, that belongs inside, Phil ...
Ray Hudson, 23:37 1st

Slipperier than an eel covered in Vaseline ... He burglarises the penalty box ...
Ray Hudson, half-time

Probably starting to see the pink elephants walking up the bedroom wall already, Phil ...
Ray Hudson, 60:06 2nd

It's team football again, Phil, it's what we've been saying the whole game. This is class exemplified and advertised in what Pellegrini, Argentina-type football, sweet. Look at the connected passes, it starts with Cani, it's ushered on, held up beautifully by Rossi, slips it into the stream, invites Cañizares out and this one is goodnight Vienna, beautiful. Sweet football, understanding, telepathic, deadly with the kill.
Ray Hudson, 73:13 2nd

Sevilla vs Getafe, August 25th

Welcome back Ray Hudson.
Lindsey Dean, pre-game

Subtle as a butterfly, sends it lovingly, heavenly ...
Ray Hudson, 2:44 1st

Handing out yellow cards like speed tickets at the Indy 500.
Ray Hudson, 47.36 1st

Hanging on the proverbial cliff-edge, like Wile E. Coyote.
Ray Hudson, 54:12 2nd

Bamboozling run, full control, pushing Licht back, taking him on, matador football, turning him round like a turtle on his back, hammers it ...
Ray Hudson, 63:06 2nd

They'll be shaking their castanets tonight.
Ray Hudson, 69:32 2nd

Frédéric Kanouté stretches that big telescopic leg and makes a heavenly guided touch on it ... he knows where the back of the net is, you cannot say it's accidental ... he's got that innate sense of sensing just how to strike the ball and where to guide it ... there may be a little bit of fortune with that one ...
Ray Hudson, 70:01 2nd

$200 Million Buyout of GolTV Falls Through

"For GolTV, meanwhile, the network has increased its awareness within the U.S. soccer community during recent months as the home to La Liga on television in the States, the growth in popularity of its American Soccer TV show, more professional graphics on screen, quality programming and growing popularity of presenters such as Phil Schoen and Ray Hudson."

EPL Talk

Brazil vs Argentina, July 15th

His men have been sent out there to get up Riquelme's nose like two big corks up, one up each nostril.
Ray Hudson, 16:52 2nd

Samba boys dancing, twinkletoes, Dopey goes ballistic, Dopey goes disco ...
Ray Hudson, 23:55 2nd

That is an absolutely existential pass by Elano.
Ray Hudson, post-game


And the hugely disappointing Hudson/Riquelme count:

1st Half
'Riquelme' - 6 times
'Romy' - 2
'Roman Riquelme' - 1
(with thanks to Jim for the SlingBox feed during the storm)

Second Half
'Riquelme' - 6
'Juan Roman Riquelme' - 1
'Romy' - 1
'Roman' - 1

Mexico vs Argentina, July 11th

It's Riquelme, man, it'll always be Riquelme ... Heinze jumps up like Rudolf Nureyev, beautiful, stabs it home but it's Riquelme, man, it looks impossible like pouring a pint of beer into a shot glass, not for Riquelme, magic.
Ray Hudson, 44:15 1st

Dangerous play ... or would that be way too harsh?
Phil Schoen
I'll punch you.
Ray Hudson, 45:02 1st

How do you describe magic? How do you describe this? It's virtually impossible. Roman applauds, the ball's dished off for Tevez, Tevez is begging for it back, Messi sees, I see you, mate, I don't need you, watch it, perfect pass by Tevez, Tevez is on for the square ball for the tap in, Lionel says no, I fancy a little bit of Roman in the night. He picks one out of Riquelme's genius book. Messi produces the rainbow and there's a pot of gold at the end of it, that is absolutely pure class in a glass.
Ray Hudson, 15:42 2nd

A concerto goal by Lionel. Sweet, sweet music ...
Ray Hudson, 16:33 2nd

Concert pianist, with his feet.
Ray Hudson, 17:25 2nd

The rhapsody of football continues. Even when they're penalties, they're painted with a beautiful stroke of genius. It's framed beautifully by the goal and the Picasso of modern football that sees things in a different dimension to the mere humans. He lives not in the tactical book, not in anything that is painted from A to B, Riquelme doesn't live there, don't look for him with the simplicity of football because he's an expressionist even on his penalty kicks.
Ray Hudson, 20:39 2nd

The two heroes that are going to have the showdown like Doc Holliday and Wyatt Earp at the OK Corral ...
Ray Hudson, 21:45 2nd

They were on the same side, weren't they? Never mind ...
Ray Hudson, 21:57 2nd

Matador. Look at him, so languid, look at him walking. He's like a big, beautiful zombie, Riquelme, like a big, beautiful zombie. He just strolls around languid like, like smoke off a cigarette, you know. And then he jump out and just draw your blood.
Ray Hudson, 25:42 2nd

Tidal wave, Rubik's cube football by the albiceleste.
Ray Hudson, 34:02 2nd

Uruguay vs Brazil, July 10th

This isn't Girls Gone Wild, it's Uruguay Gone Wild. Forlan does beautiful, great streaking hurtful run. Again, beautiful build-up, they were threatening and we were announcing it.
Ray Hudson, 24:35 2nd

Argentina vs Peru, July 8th

Here you see him, trickier than a monkey up a monkey tree.
Ray Hudson, 19:09 1st

But it's an absolute flamethrower from the magic man himself, look at this, it's an absolutely laser beam ... from the Picasso of Argentinian football, Boca Juniors hero, Argentinia god, Roman Riquelme, man, you can bottle him up for a length of time, but then he will hurt you ...
Ray Hudson, 1:48 2nd

What an absolute scientific goal again, and it's Riquelme who is the Einstein of it, this is a beautiful move of the highest world-class order, stand up, get out of your sofas and applaud if you're a football fan because the poets just wrote a sonnet to all of us ... look at that ball, are you kidding me? It splits open four white shirts, and little Lionel, look at this again, oh my lord, that is vision personified ...
Ray Hudson, 15:59 2nd

Get down on your hands and knees and thank us all for giving you the pictures of an absolute artisan of the modern game ... he's Einstein man, he's from the stars, just love him, anybody who doesn't see it I really truly feel sorry for you, Phil, really I do.
Ray Hudson, 40:56 2nd

Chile vs Brazil, July 7th

Julio Baptista, hotter than South Beach, what a Jalapeño hit this is, fabulous build-up by Brazil, Dunga goes disco, beautiful, steered, spanked shot, kisses the back post ...
Ray Hudson, 22:29 1st

Robinho impersonating Robin Hood, gets his arrow out, and he hits the bullseye ...
Ray Hudson, 28:06 1st

Josué, as lively as a cheerleader after a big pot of coffee, Cuban coffee, Brazilian coffee ...
Ray Hudson, 23:16 2nd